Shower Her with Love

Forget cards, flowers, and chocolates… Well, don’t forget them, but don’t rely only on them. What she really wants is sincerity and love! Love offered freely and without strings attached. I’m talking about love given regardless of what you get in return. I’ll let you in on a little secret: You must give unconditional love to get it.

Kristine and I have been married for 19 years and been together for 26. Over those years I’ve given her countless cards, flowers, and chocolates. But, the one thing that stands out to her more than anything is a simple thing I said to her about 22 years ago… One day when she was feeling a ittle down, she shared with me something along the lines of not being good enough. Without a second’s delay, I responded, “Look around you… Look at all of my stuff. I surround myself with only the best of the best. My stereo, guitar, TV, and other things are all the very finest you can buy. Do you think you are any different?”

That may not sound like much to you, but it’s precisely what I’m talking about. It was sincere and said honestly with love. I meant it. And, she knew I meant it. Therefore, it has stuck with her all of these years. To this day she still reminds me of how special that conversation made her feel.

I’m not telling you to skip the flowers, but I am suggesting that there are others things you can give, do, and say that will be much more memorable. One of the most important things that I’ve discovered is listening. I mean real listening… Not sitting there while she’s talking. I’m talking about, turn the TV off, set your phone down, step away from the laptop kind of listening

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. Look her in the eyes and nod at appropriate times. Then, when she’s done talking, compute what she said and reply with an honest assessment and appreciation with what you heard.

This ain’t rocket science, folks. Many would have you believe that relationships are incredibly tough and nearly impossible to build and keep strong. The truth is, they are much simpler than we pretend. Level with your soul mate, treat her with honor and dignity, and listen to her. This is the valuable key to staying in a healthy relationship.

There are people out there that will tell you that a man is weak for doting on his wife. This is ridiculous and any man who deserves a good woman in his life knows that it’s untrue. The truth is that it is our responsibility to love and care for our wives and our families. A real man can be strong and compassionate at the same time.

Tell me what you do to shower your spouse with love. Tell me what you’ve tried… What works, and what doesn’t?

I hope this article was beneficial.

Heartfelt feelings sent your way,

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About Vaughn Ripley

Vaughn is a happily married daddy, author, and CIO. He is an HIV+ hemophiliac, and is one of the longest surviving HIV+ people in the universe.
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  1. I take the kids and send her off on her own. Or leave her home alone in a quiet house. There’s so little time to ourselves as parents of 3, this is often the most valuable thing I can offer her.

  2. Michelle Sidor says

    It is apparent that you and Chuck are “Nerds of a feather”. We haven’t been together long, but I can tell you the genuinity of his Love is what leaves me confident, secure, strong, and to be blunt…feeling like a woman. It would be great to have your wife follow up with an article on doting on your man. A man can dote all he wants on his woman, but if the lady does not respond with Love… It’s not fair, it’s not right. This world needs more strong love affairs for our youth to see. Love you already. Can’t wait to meet you. Excellent article.

    • Thank you so much for the wonderful words, Michelle. Like you, I cannot wait to meet! I wish you guys were closer and we could hang out on Friday nights!

      Kristine does an awesome job of doting on me, but I doubt she will write anything about it… That’s not her bag. However, that is a cool idea! Perhaps you would like to be a guest blogger and do an article titled, “Doting on Your Man.” *hint hint*