What’s Best in Life?


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. So that’s a very broad question… But I can answer one piece of it.

Most of us (me included) do not know what we want. Before you say, “No *expletive deleted* Sherlock!” Allow me to dig a little bit deeper.

It occurred to me that I’m not doing what I want to do. Even though this occurs to me on a regular basis, one memory from four years ago still lingers… You see, I was riding the train home and sitting next to someone that was putting off a putrid body odor. Before everyone knocks my lack of compunction, let me tell you that this was far beyond your standard human being stink. I’m not talking someone who walked two miles to the train station on a humid 95 degree day without underarm deodorant. I’m talking about the kind of stink that lingers over a two-week old dead body lying in a rainforest.

Now that I have sufficiently gotten your attention (and perhaps offended the Hell out of you), allow me to continue…

Sitting for 1.5 hours smelling death in a small, hot train car can make you come to some realizations in life. For one, I realized that I don’t ever want to do that again!

During this time, I found myself pondering the immortal words of Conan (played by Arnold Schwarzenegger), when he was asked, “What’s best in life?” Without missing a beat, Conan replied, “Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentations of their women.” Now there’s a guy who knows what he wants!

The more that I think about Conan’s statement, the more I understand my lack of an answer to the question “What’s best in life?”

I know what my dream day would be like… I would wake up, take a short walk, and then swim (in my backyard pool) for an hour or so. After a shower, I would eat a good (nutritious) breakfast that was prepared by my nutritionalist and chef. Following that, I would write for about two hours straight (uninterrupted). Next, I would spend some playtime with Kristine and kids. Once we wore ourselves out, I would hit the music theory and guitar for an hour or two. After guitar, I’d tackle some business by returning emails, calls, and innovating my next great idea. Then, I would get some more kid playtime in. I’d squeeze some form of physical fitness in at this point in the day. Finally, I would wind down with the kids and Kristine watching TV or goofing off. After putting the kids to bed I would do some more business and prepare my agenda for tomorrow (more of the same). Before turning off the light for the night, I’d get some reading in.

That day would obviously be altered to fit in other activities, hobbies, etc. Also, from time-to-time, there would be a two-week vacation to somewhere exotic.

Funny thing about my list… I don’t see work (at least not in the traditional fashion) listed. Try as I might, I can’t seem to squeeze it in there. Some of you might argue that my writing (if done on a professional level) would be considered my work. Or, doing my entrepreneurial business ventures. I guess that’s true, but running my own business in brief time slots and writing are both things that I am passionate about. I don’t normally associate passion with work. Viola! Therein lies the problem… In order to make my life more meaningful, I need to be passionate about what I do for a living! *cue inspirational music*

The problem grows when you consider that balancing things you are passionate about and work is nearly impossible. So, I have decided to dedicate some time and effort to figure this out… If and when I figure something out, I will probably write an instructional manual and publish it.

For now, I will continue to commute to and from work. And, I will continue discussing these things with you on my blog.

Please feel free to comment with what you feel is best in life!

Signed,
A passionate man who is still seeking his passion!

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About Vaughn Ripley

Vaughn is a happily married daddy, author, and CIO. He is an HIV+ hemophiliac, and is one of the longest surviving HIV+ people in the universe.
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Comments

  1. Another side of this same puzzle would be the question from Tyler Durdin in Fight Club (as they’re barreling down a road in an out of control car): “Boys, what do you wish you’ve done before you die?”. Another question to which you should know your answer.

  2. Hey Vaughan – I often help my clients discover their passions, and the results can be astonishing. A couple of times, it turned out that their top 5 passions combined were their purpose in life. It’s the most amazing thing when you get that clarity. Some people are able to turn their passion into a calling that supports them financially and frees them from the JOB. Others keep their JOB because of the benefits, but use it to finance their passion.

    We need to have more than just our ideal day to live for (we can only do that for so long before it becomes a rut). We need a purpose higher than ourselves that we can tackle with every fiber of our beings in order to be fully satisfied. Once you are living your passion, you can never go back.

    Maybe you should ask yourself why you are doing your entrepreneurial business ventures. Is it to make money and give you the lifestyle you want? Is it to change the world? Is it to give people an opportunity to do more with their lives or to better themselves? Is it to give back to the community? If you know why you’re doing it and can identify it as a reason you can’t live without, then you are on your way to uncovering how balanced things really are.

  3. Great points about looking forward and moving towards the goals you want. I like the idea of knowing what you want to do on your perfect day.

    On the other hand, I’m so buried in life that I simple strive to have fun in my present. Sometimes I step back, like you do here, and envision the life I want to lead with work, family, hobbies, etc. But most times, I just try to have fun in my current day. I laugh whenever possible. I take time to ask the kids questions or talk about what they are doing in school. I engage in the great stuff at work with passion as much as possible.

    I’m not perfect and I’ll never stop reaching for a better future, but sometimes we need to be happy in the present first.